Udo: “Our eyes met and we chose each other”

“I was 24 and looking for adventure. As a soldier I was stationed in Curacao for a year and then I really couldn’t get used to it in the Netherlands. My childhood was It was hectic and Amsterdam West was not a peaceful area to come back to. I felt locked up in the Netherlands and wanted to travel the world in search of space and nature.

During this period, I went to yoga and the teacher caught my attention, but since my mind was already busy leaving, I had no eye for love. During the course, we had to do an exercise together and then it happened: our eyes met and we chose each other. As a final exercise, we had to sit back to back. One last relaxation.”

“That moment when my restless mind finally went silent, I felt warmth and energy flowing between us. When we got dressed, we looked at each other and said, ‘until the next time “. The last time I did yoga, I didn’t take any initiative, even though I knew we might not see each other again.”

Towards the mountains and nature

“We met again at the supermarket and we were talking about St. John’s Day that night and she said, ‘Are we going to go together?’ We both clicked and shared a love of nature and the mountains It took me a long time to let someone close but from the moment we sat back to back I got felt safe with her.

We took short trips and vacationed together in the French Alps. After our third vacation together, we thought, why not live somewhere with mountains and beautiful nature? We thought of New Zealand, but in the end it was Norway, because my girlfriend got a job there.”

“It took a while to get her work permit, and in the meantime I was training to become a psychiatric nurse. Something happened there: I fell in love with a girl in my class. However, it was clear that we could not continue together; she was very Christian and I a devotee of Bhagwan. It was hard to get along and I still loved my girlfriend.

Choose between two women

“I talked about my crush, but that we would still be friends. My girlfriend gave me a choice: I had to end the friendship or she would break up with me. I said I couldn’t because “She meant a lot to me. Strangely enough, this was the second time in my life that I had to choose between two women.

Once in elementary school I fell in love with two girls and lost them both and the same thing happened again. My girlfriend broke up with me and the girl in my class cut contact, marrying someone of her own faith shortly after.”

“My girlfriend got her work permit and moved to Norway. I had stopped my studies after an internship in a psychiatric ward because I realized that the job was not suitable for me, and suddenly everything disappeared. My love, my studies, everything. I fell into a huge hole.”

indian ritual

“We stayed in touch and after a year we saw each other again in Zwolle. There was a lot of distance between us and a lot of frustration, but when I saw her again I felt how much she meant to me. What a mess I had made I realized I had to get my life back on track A few months later I traveled to Norway with plans to do a vision quest in the mountains, which is a ritual three days of fasting and solitude in a place of nature, in order to find strength and understanding.”

“I traveled to an area not too far from my girlfriend and I looked for a place that suited me: on a beach by a mountain lake. It became three intensive days, during which I I was confronted with my fear The fear of living, the fear for love, the fear of bonding I have never been so afraid as that night when I had to watch in the dark and the mist.

But it worked and I found strength and love in it. Finally, I was able to face my fear and traveled to her. My heart told me: I choose her and the life we ​​both want. She was skeptical at first, but eventually the distance between us disappeared and we found each other.”

Never regretted

“After two years I finished my studies and found a job in Norway. The road was bumpy in the years that followed and not easy, but our love carried us through difficult times. Now, almost forty years after we had our backs together, we are still together and our love has been able to grow.

I have never regretted my choice. I had to work a lot for it and learn a lot more, but finally I found the way to my heart.”

Wanted: love lessons

For RTL News Lifestyle’s Love Lesson section, we are looking for beautiful, vulnerable, funny, inspiring and honest love lessons. A glimpse, a moment of reflection. Preferably with one hand in your own bosom. Did you finally turn out to be the one who’s afraid of commitment? Was it never necessary to emigrate for love or did a composite family finally turn out to be an illusion? Journalist Hanneke Mijnster would like to ask you about this. Telling is allowed anonymously. Send a mail to: [email protected].