Women mostly think ‘we’, with men every sentence starts with ‘I’

Andries Jonker was curious if he would find the same with the Orange Women. In 2001, while working for six months as the interim national coach of the Dutch women’s team, he had already noticed that women experienced football in a completely different way to men. Roughly speaking: women mainly have the “we-think”, men mainly think of themselves.

Could the growing influence of money, growing media attention and the individualisation of society have changed that, Jonker wondered when he started as national coach of Orange last August. “But that hasn’t changed,” he said. “It’s always exactly the same.”

“I want to be the best, I want to be the best”

This created a stark contrast. After 2001, Jonker worked exclusively for men’s teams. As assistant to Louis van Gaal at FC Barcelona and Bayern Munich, as head of the youth academy at Arsenal and as coach of MVV, Willem II and VfL Wolfsburg. His last club was Telstar, where he had to work with limited resources between 2019 and 2022.

“I take Telstar, where I had fun for three years, as an example,” says Jonker, who is currently preparing for the World Cup in Australia and New Zealand, which starts on Thursday. “At Telstar, I worked with extremely motivated guys, but deep down – and I partly understand this – it was about them, about ‘me’. I want to play Telstar, I want to be in the base, I want to be the best, I want to be sold, I want to go to a better club, I want to earn more money, etc. Every sentence always begins with I. This does not make it easy for a trainer. Because you have to manage all these egos, all these interests, so that they fit together in a team.

Men are more likely to ask the “why question”

Orange women have a fundamentally different culture, Jonker noted. “These women come here saying: who are we? What can we do? How do we fit together best? Which way of playing suits us best? And if we’re going to play like this, how can I best fit in? Women think a lot more from the perspective of the team, the idea of ​​us,” says the Amsterdamer. “Their dedication goes a little further. Because it’s not just about themselves, but they also care about each other. And they recognize much more than they really come into their own when the other person is functioning as well.

A real or a fake? Jonker wants to watch out for that. An example: “If I race with cones during practice, I don’t even have to tell the women to go around the caps. They do it anyway. Men are much more likely to ask the “why” question. I don’t think it’s positive that women don’t do it or hardly do it. With me, they can talk a little more often with each other and with me. Reinforcing his words: “But that’s also where team thinking comes in. Like: I don’t want to be perceived as difficult by my teammates, I don’t want to be perceived as decisive and dominating in the group, etc. .

Jonker has explicitly sought confrontation with his players in view of the World Cup. He wants them to become more vocal, to express themselves more. “I can’t predict everything. In the end, they have to solve it themselves in the field. They have to make the right choices. Because of group discussions, where my way of working is to put things on the table through interaction, they can’t help but give their opinion. What do you think about it? Sometimes someone will say, “I don’t know”. This usually leads to some hilarity. But these are not higher mathematical questions that I am asking.

Spitse, Van de Donk and Groenen

Truly outspoken leaders have become increasingly rare – as have men – notes Jonker. This is why he often tests his observations and considerations beforehand with the three captains, Sherida Spitse, Daniëlle van de Donk and Jackie Groenen, who took the place of the injured Vivianne Miedema. “I think it suits this team better. They all have different characters, different perspectives, but are very involved and do it with a positive approach. Who helps.”

Making a team better is what drives Jonker. “In this phase of my career, I especially want to do what makes me happy,” says the former PE teacher. “I’ve always had a sense of independence in my life. In the sense that I am independent of what is happening. I am now sixty years old, time and my life experience have done their work. I’ve been through a lot, seen a lot. And then you also know that it’s nice. That I can work with people who want to get the best out of themselves and each other every day.

Read also:

Under the guidance of Andries Jonker, the lionesses learn that making mistakes is part of it

The training campaign appeals to national coach Andries Jonker. “It’s not an easy task, but I’m convinced that we can still put together a good Dutch team.”